I find this amazing. At my annual consultation back in January, the CPM of my presbytery told me I was excessively happy, chipper, out-going, open, joyful, extroverted, etc. and that because of this, I might have a serious problem showing sad, angry, or upset emotion.
Today/tonight? I'm feeling really rather emotionally drained. And sad. And upset. And anything but excessively happy, chipper, out-going, open, joyful, and extroverted.
Maybe it's because the 15th is coming. Maybe it's because I'm afraid people really do find me annoying. Maybe it's because I feel like I'll never be good enough for anyone or be someone that anyone will want to spend forever with. Maybe it's because it's been raining and is raining again. Maybe I'm just tired. Maybe this term is more stressful than I'm really letting anyone believe. Maybe it's all of these things. Maybe it's none.
I wish people didn't say things that could be deemed as hurtful, even if they're just meant in jest. More than that, I wish I wasn't so sensitive to those things. I wish I could be someone who just didn't care. But I do care. It does matter to me. And I do feel the pain when something is said that turns out to be hurtful.
Enough of that for now... I'm gonna do a bit more reading and then crawl into bed.
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Well, is someone says something that you find offensive and/or hurtful, then you should probably tell them. Otherwise, they won't know.
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